First of all let me just say a huge SORRRRRYYY & also a HAPPY NEW YEAR. 2017 is finally here!
I know, i know i should be ashamed of myself. i promised to post weekly but i failed.
I'm just going to keep it real and say, i had NO motivation whatsoever, which is a very bad but honest excuse.
This year, starting from now i promise you, you will see a difference, believe me.
Personally for me last year was not such a great year overall, if you can agree on this then you should know that this year is going to be an AMAZING year.
Hopefully by this point, you have forgiven me :)
Have you ever just sat down and though," Do i really need this?, is it worth it?". This is in regards to anything, friendships, relationships, work.. anything. You have ? well me too. I'm sure there are times where you just want to give up everything and drop everyone, most times for no absolute reason. This happens to everyone whether you want to admit it or not. It happens and it's perfectly NORMAL. I'm not going to tell you "Oh, everything will be okay, everything will be fine" cause, sometimes those words actually don't mean anything.
How can you tell me everything will be okay when your not in my situation?
When exactly will everything be okay?
Why do i still feel lonely surrounded by supportive and loving people?
All i can only say is, don't give up, PLEASE. Everything may not be perfect tomorrow when you wake up, but gradually things will get better, i promise.
But..
You can't expect everything to just change, if YOU don't push yourself, mentally. Positive thinking can change the way your life turns out. I'm not saying be happy everyday because that is physically not possible, come on! (it's okay to be upset sometimes).
If your in a relationship or speaking to someone that you know doesn't represent your worth, find your worth somewhere else. No, he/she won't change for you if you ask them. You cannot change someone unless they want to. Don't devalue yourself to please another, it just ends with you hurt. I know it hurts, but eventually it will make sense." He doesn't check up on me unless he wants sex"," He is still talking to his ex, but claims that they are friends (or co parenting)), " We have been together for nearly a year and he doesn't let me on his phone unless hes next to me, then when i get annoyed claims i'm crazy and don't trust him", " He's only hit me twice but i know he loves me". I can literally go on and on but do you get my drift? If your in this situation, what exactly are you doing? I've been there, and I had to learn the hard way before i finally left someone that did not deserve my time. How long are you going to wait until you finally leave? Will it be too late? Will the damage be irreparable?
I may not know everyone that is reading this blog but honestly, trust me when i say i care. You deserve much better. Your current situation is not going to be your last. If you put your mind to it seriously, you can actually do much much better.
What pains me the most is that, people around us are going through things like this on a daily, but cannot come to us to tell us in fear of being judged or in fear that we will just dismiss them. If this is you, please find someone to speak to. Someone out there cares about what you have to say, someone out there is actually willing to help you. Understand that anyone that makes you believe that they are above you are actually, way beneath you and they KNOW this, hence as to why they are treating you they way they are. Insecurity can lead an individual to behave in a way that is beyond crazy. Moreover the reason why someone may say to you " I am the only thing you have left, no one else will love you like me", is because that's exactly how they feel about themselves and they themselves know that you are beyond lovable so their demons start to play with them.
Do not go searching for someone that reminds you of your ex, or the person that hurt you. That is the mistake that most people subconsciously make without realizing until the pattern becomes evident. I'm not going to say wait for someone to find you because that also can have the same result as there are many manipulating people out there that, will find your weakness and play with it. What i can honestly say, is BE CAREFUL in everything you do. Do not rush into things just because it "feels right", cause that feeling can also be the feeling that leads you into depression. Do not forget to pray before you proceed into any form of relationship, that's important too. Never forget, not everything is meant to be.
I don't want to make this blog post, long although i can go on for agessss, literally.
I'm going to end this by saying, whoever is reading this and can relate to this post, do not give up ! Keep going, look how far you've come honestly. If you have to make 2017 a selfish year just to find happiness, do it. No one can be mad at you for helping yourself. I also pray that anyone reading this has a positive, blessed and purpose-filled year. Don't let the mistakes and hurts from 2016 reappear in 2017. I love you. I'm praying for anyone going through any type of depression. This year is yours.
"Keep sitting pretty, stay gorgeous" -Ama'Queen xo